ready2bskinE

So much has happened the past several days! First of all, I found out that restricting carbs is NOT for me.  I’m sure tons of people have found success with that method of eating, but for me it just leads to over eating and junk food cravings.  So I will NEVER do that again!  My focus will be staying within a certain calorie count and choosing healthy foods that I enjoy. Who says lunch has to be chicken breast and green beans instead of whole grain pasta with chicken and veggies?  I know how to do healthy carbs, and I’m not ever going to restrict them again.  :)   It’s far too taxing on both my mind and my body!

Secondly, How do I even begin here? Basically, I’m planning to break up with running.  Yep, I’m leaving him.  I don’t have any other time to do my runs other than before sunrise, it’s just downright too cold!  I have ear aches from my Monday and Tuesday runs.  I got dressed to go out again this morning, but I just don’t see any point in putting myself through this.  So I’ve decided to join the ranks of seasonal runners.  I’ve thought this through, and while I will most definitely miss running and look forward with hope to the spring, I know that I can find other forms of cardio I’m sure to enjoy.  My husband is supposed to go get my boxing gear this weekend!  Yay!!  So that’ll help.  I have a step, a jump rope, and tons of DVD’s.  For today, I plan on taking the kids outside, and while they play I’m going to jump rope and do jumping jacks alternately.  If I give it enough time, it’s sure to burn at least as many calories as jogging.  It’s about time I switched it up a bit anyway….  My left ankle has been sore all week, and I don’t want to risk a serious injury.

I had also planned a lower body workout for today. Well, that’s what was on my schedule.  But I upped my normal weights for Monday’s lower body workout, and added a few new moves, and I’m so sore I can’t walk right!  My glutes… OMG  And my inner thighs.  I thought about still doing lower body but focusing more on my calves and quads, but since I’m basically sore all over and dragging my ass, I’m switching up to yoga, lots of stretching, and abs/back work, with my jumping around late this afternoon and a good stretch session again afterwards.

I’m not used to switching things up like this… I’m a Taurus, and that contributes to my natural tendency to just want to bull-headedly push through and go ahead with my plans, but I think when it comes to fitness, listening to my body is the smarter choice.

I got this little exercise from issue of Oxygen magazine, and I found it very motivational.   I encourage anyone who keeps a journal (whether it’s a regular journal or a fitness journal) to do this exercise as well. 

You work out almost every day, but do you know why? Understanding what really motivates you, whether external  or internal goals, can make a difference between getting just a great body for now or getting a hot body and healthy mind for life. Take a moment to map out how to make you fit lifestyle stick.

Imagine yourself at your most fit and healthiest stage; how do you look? Describe your ideal body.

For me, it starts with nice, healthy skin from drinking plenty of water. No fat under my chin! Clavicles-I remember when I first saw that I still had them! lol  Love them in a sexy dress. Moving on to very toned shoulders, and strong but not bulging biceps. Strong, toned back and chest. Small, defined waist, muscular abs- FLAT stomach! Slender hips. Toned, muscular thighs and calves.

There is nothing wrong with working out to look good but it shouldn’t be the only reason. Write down a few words that describe how you feel after a workout.

After a workout, I feel STRONG! I feel sexy, energized, and happy. Weights make me feel invincible and tough. Running makes me feel dedicated and successful. Pilates and yoga make me feel calm, relaxed, and balanced.

Working out to both look good and feel good will keep you training for the long haul. Next time  you feel like skipping a workout, refer to the lists above for motivation.

My goals for the next several weeks include:

• Improving my running, working up to 10K training.
• Lifting heavier weights.
• Consistent exercise. (Not just when the weather’s nice or when I feel like it, but completing my planned work out daily, regardless of my emotional response to it.)
• Start boxing training. (With the gloves, bag, jump rope, whole 9 yards. I want to be a tough chick!)
• Cleaner eating.
• Goal weight: 115; Goal size: 3/4

My beginning measurements for this 12 (or so) week challenge will be my ending ones from yesterday. 

And here’s my workout plan (for starter’s anyway, I don’t have my boxing gear yet, but it’s been promised to me.)

• Monday: 45 minute walk, lower body work.
• Tuesday: 5-8 x 400 interval workout, abs work, and upper body work.
• Wednesday: 3-4 mile run, lower body work.
• Thursday: Rest!, abs work.
• Friday: 40 minute jog, upper body work.
• Saturday: 5-7 mile run, abs work.
• Sunday: 30 minute easy jog (active rest day, they call it), and upper body work.

I try to focus on each body area 2-3 times per week, sort of like bodybuilders do, only my focus is a whole, rather than individual muscles.  (I’m not to that point yet!)  The workouts that I have for each area (upper, lower, and abs) are basically compilations of moves that I’ve gleaned from videos and magazines, such as Jillian’s 30 Day Shred, various yoga videos, and LOTS of workouts in Oxygen and Shape and Fitness magazines.  Their websites have lots of great workout information if (when!) I need something fresh.  I spend probably 20-30 minutes on each of these toning/strengthening workouts.

For right now, I’m not really restricting my calories much. I try to keep it around 1800 calories per day, with one low day (on my rest day) around 1300, and one very high day around 2200-that high day gives me the opportunity to satisfy any cravings I may have had during the week without going over on my weekly total.  The other days vary, 1600-2000, averaging out to 1800/day for the week.  It’s enough to keep me full, and hopefully enough to be able to build muscle while still burning fat.  (The building of muscle tissue actually requires a calorie surplus, but I don’t really want to gain weight; I’m open to the idea that I may in the future have to increase my calorie intake, but for now, I’m going with 1800/day and we’ll see where it leads.)  :)  I’ve been reading about appropriate diets for building muscle, and while carbs and fats are necessary, the best diet seems to be high in protein, with moderate amounts of carbs and slightly lower in fat.  So that’s what I’m going to try for this challenge (at least TRY to stick with, because God knows I CRAVE carbs after a good, sweaty workout!) ; I don’t imagine it will be easy, because so far I have been eating “whatever” as long as it is within my calorie allowance.  Not necessarily junk food, but still not monitoring the macronutrient ratios.  So this will be a new challenge for me, but hopefully one that will give me that extra boost I need to get that hard body I want so badly! 

So… that’s it.  Just a personal challenge to myself, some goals I’d REALLY like to achieve by the end of the year, and some areas of improvement I’d love to see.    I can’t help but think, after this little challenge is over, I’ll be in the midst of the Christmas rush, and then it’s time to set new goals for the New Year!  Hopefully reaching the goals I’ve set here in this time frame will help me start 2010 off on the best foot ever, fitter than ever. 

Side note: I seriously doubt I’ll be able to get down to 115 lbs over the next 3 months, as I tend to lose about 1-2 lbs per month, but it’s a goal, and I’m going to work hard to get as close as I can safely in this time frame.  I’m thinking that maybe the two goals of a lower weight and building muscle may contradict each other (???)  BUT all I can do is wait and see while working hard and doing my best. 

I don’t have any new pics to post as of right this second, but I’ll get some on here as soon as I can.  (I’m not good at that stuff, and it’s a hassle for me, so please bear with me.  )

But for anyone interested, here are the results of my 8 week challenge to myself.

Starting Measurements:                                   Ending:

bicep: 11 inches                                                   11 (-0)

chest: 35 inches                                                   33.5  (-1.5)

waist: 28.5 inches                                               28  (-.5)

33 inches at belly button                                    31.5  (-1.5)

hips: 36 inches                                                     34.5  (-1.5)

upper thigh:  19.5 inches                                    18.75  (-.75)

calf: 13.75 inches                                                    13  (-.75)

Weight: 129.5 lbs                                                   127.5   (-2 lbs)

I didn’t really have any “set” goals for this challenge; I just wanted to see how well I could do.  2 lbs is almost embarrassing, but it really does take me a long time to lose weight.  I go through a lot of back and forth, like lose 2 lbs one week, gain 1 the next week, etc…. And I gained a FEW lbs over the Labor Day weekend, so I’m pretty happy with a 2 lb loss over the last several weeks.  I’m *very* surprised by the inches lost, though slightly saddened that so many of them came from my chest area.  No big surprise though! lol  I knew I was getting plenty smaller up there!  Happy that I got a couple of inches off my tummy, though I’d like to shed still more.

I’m thinking that Autumn officially starts tomorrow and ends on December 20…. Maybe  a little pre-Christmas personal challenge is in order.    I want to set some specific goals and workout plans this time through; give me the evening to think it over and I’ll be back tomorrow. 

I finally dusted off my Wii Fit the other night.  :)  My favorite workout is running, but it has been raining like crazy here lately, and it shows no sign of letting up til Sunday at the earliest.  But that doesn’t mean anything, cuz Monday the weather girl said we’d have a perfect, sunny weekend… lol  Now it’s rain through Saturday with a chance Sunday. Ugh…  Anyway, so I’ve been at a loss when it comes to finding fun workouts, and remembered I paid like $500 for this Wii and balance board not too long ago, Why not use that. 

So when I started the game, it weighed me, and told me how close I was to my goal.  I set it at 125, so pretty close but not there yet.  (I haven’t played it in a WHILE and I had lost over 10 lbs since last time, but still not at goal.)  So I was pretty happy to be so close, BUT I kind of muttered under my breath, “That’s not even my goal anymore anyway.”  My husband was sitting on the couch, and he was like, “What are you trying to get down to now? 110?”  He said it all sarcastic, like I’d just blow away in the wind of I weighed 110 lbs.  I looked at him like he was crazy, and I said, “OMG! No way….” But he could tell by the look on my face that he was close. “115?” He asked.  Blank stare from me.  “You’re crazy….” he informed me.  But I’m telling you guys like I told him, all I want is to be able to look in the mirror, and LIKE what I see! Is that too much to ask?  If I were skin and bones, trying to lose more weight, I’d be like, “Yeah, maybe I’m crazy….” But seriously, 115 is not even at the bottom of my recommended healthy weight range.  (I’m barely 5′5″) It’s my body fat % I’m more worried about anyway, but that’s harder to explain.  He knows that I want heavier weights, and I’m going to get them this weekend.

We were “wrestling” a few nights ago, and I found out that if my husband pins my upper body where I can’t move my arms, I can still get him off of me!  :)  He was like, “Damn, your legs are getting STOUT!”  All that running, lunges, squats, bridges, etc… But if he gets on me where I can’t move my legs, I can’t BUDGE him with my arms.  ZERO upper body strength… at least compared to my legs.  I definitely plan on working on that over the next several weeks; It was embarrassing.

Oh, here’s the other reason I’m crazy (according to him).  Ok, so the town we live in is GHETTO!  It’s ridiculous how scary this place is at night, and during the day, it’s not a *whole* lot better.  So whenever I’m planning a shopping trip, we ALWAYS go out of town.  (I will go to the Wal Mart here if I just need a couple things that I forgot, or something comes up unexpectedly during the week, but I definitely try to get everything elsewhere on the weekends.)  So we drove to the next town over to go to Wal Mart, and I had just happened to reset the mileage tracker thing on the dash.  It was exactly 27 miles to the Wal Mart there, and when I saw that, I said “Cool!”  :)  Big smile! He asked me WHY that was cool of course.  lol  I told him that’s about how far a marathon is, and *someday* I planned on running that far, and it just made it click in my head exactly how far it was, and I was just thinking about maybe trying it someday. (Not soon; can’t even finish 10 miles yet!)  And he said that was crazy!! Now, thousands of people run marathons every year… How is that crazy??

I think he’s just saying these things are crazy because he doesn’t think I can do them, but I most certainly CAN and I plan on proving it to him.  :)  I am NOT crazy, but I do set high goals for myself, and I think I’m ambitious enough to accomplish them.

Doutzen Kroes, Jamie Eason…. I could post more pics of more women who inspire me, but these two are shining examples of what my “ideal body” is.  Yes, these women are models.  They are gorgeous women, but frankly that’s not what inspires me.  These are women who very obviously work hard at looking the way they want to look.  Not stick thin fashion models (well, Doutzen is a fashion model, but at 120 lbs, she’s definitely at the upper end of their size spectrum)  these are beautiful, physically FIT women who OWN their workouts.

I don’t necessarily look at these women and think “I want to look like her,” though I can occasionally detect that thought somewhere in the back of my mind.  :)   What I think when I look at these pictures is, “Wow, I wonder what her workouts are like….”  Whatever they’re doing to look their best might also help me look my best!

Hollywood’s and New York Fashion Week’s standards of perfection are very different from my own, but I definitely have an image in my mind of the ideal body, and I’m determined to work hard until I’m as close to it as I can get myself.

I don’t want to fall into that trap of going to the mall or whatever, looking at the women around me and thinking, “I look average, I look like all these other women, so I must be ok.”  What’s the fun in looking just like every one else?  That is *not* what I’ve been working so hard for.  Not that I need to feel “superior” or get extra attention, but I definitely believe looking my absolute best *does* boost my self-confidence which improves every aspect of life. 

After all, if you were building a house, you wouldn’t go to the run-down section of town looking for inspiration.  If you have a medical question, you don’t ask someone who flunked out of medical school.  And if you’re trying to get in shape, you don’t look at the women at the mall for inspiration.  Find someone who is where you want to be and follow their example and learn from what they’ve done! 

I’m not sure exactly WHAT THE HECK has been going on with me lately.  I *was* totally pumped about being so close to my goal weight; my motivation was really high; I had lots of goals and step-by-step plans and workouts to achieve them.

Then somewhere along the way, Reese’s peanut butter cups happened.  Doritos happened.  Cool weather and grilling steaks and burgers happened.  JUNK FOOD IS SO YUMMY!!!!!

*sigh*  Now I’m right back up, close to 130 lbs.  This morning the scale said 129-point-something; this is after a semi-large chip binge last night.

I’ve read several articles about getting the last 10 pounds off, and they all seem to be saying basically the same thing.  Increase exercise intensity, DECREASE amount of food, or at the very least, be FAR MORE selective about what it is you’re eating.  Combined with re-evaluating your goal, to make sure it’s healthy; some people can’t get the last 10 pounds off simply because their bodies are healthier where they are than 10 lbs lighter.

So I thought about it: is my goal, my *dream* weight of 120 entirely too low?  Maybe, but I’ll only know if I *try* hard to get there, by upping my workout intensity and cleaning up my diet.  I know that getting these last 10 pounds off is going to require some serious dedication, and I’m a little nervous about comitting to it, but I really want to see if I can do it.  After all, if I can give myself that final push I need to reach this ultimate goal, maybe that will give me the confidence to do the same thing in other areas of my life.  If all I ever do is stop when I’m comfortable, give up when going further requires too much work, I’ll always just be “mediocre” at everything.  So I’m going to give myself the opportunity to try.

I’m not sure what a good goal time-frame would be for these last 10 pounds; after all, these aren’t just any old 10 lbs. lol    No doubt they’ll take a lot longer to come off than the first or second 10 lbs.  But if I can have them off by Christmas, I’ll be ecstatic.  If I can keep them off through the holidays, I’ll be amazed.  lol  (After all, dedicated is the dieter~person for that matter~ who doesn’t gain at least 5 lbs through the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year celebrations!) 

I feel like I’m always “starting over” but this time, I don’t necessarily need to.  I’m going to look at this “Last 10 Pounds” as a journey unto itself.    I think I might start a forum topic, for anyone else interested in sharing workouts and diet tips (and of course, daily struggles) in getting off those last 10 pounds….

I shared an article earlier this week that mentioned the “diet mentality” making all diets unhealthy.  Now, while I totally respect everyone’s opinions and completely believe that there’s NO 1-right-way to do anything, for me, the counting calories and thinking non stop about what I could or couldn’t eat was becoming a stumbling block.  So I decided to STOP doing it.  Of course, I’m still careful about my portion sizes and making sure I get plenty of fruit, veggies, whole grains, and protein, but I threw the whole number tracking system out the window and replaced it with a new commitment to get in plenty of exercise and water.

It’s working wonders!! I’m not even necessarily trying to lose weight anymore; if I maintain from here on out, I’ll be happy, but if I lose a couple of more lbs by eating a healthy diet and getting in my running and toning, then I’m happy with that too.  And the scale is steadily going down.  I’m stunned actually, because when I was TRYING so hard to break into the 120’s, counting every calorie, planning every single meal and snack, I kept gaining and losing the same 3 lbs.  Let go of that stress, and it’s like a miracle.  :)  Saturday I weighed in at 131, and today I’m down to 129, and there’s still 3 more days til I officially weigh in again so I’m pretty excited.  Apparently this is going to work out great for me, and I’m so thrilled because I’m starting to feel “normal” again (as opposed to being on a continuous diet).

I always said, “It’s not a diet, it’s a lifestyle change,” like so many of you.  But UNLIKE so many others, I was stuck in that diet mentality of counting calories and thinking “if I ate that earlier today, then here are my choices for dinner….”  restricting, feeling guilty, binging.    Ups and downs…. terrible cycles.  That’s not a lifestyle, and if it is, it certainly isn’t one I want to maintain for the rest of my life.  What I’m doing now is much more in-tune with who I am. 

Running Update:   I finally timed myself and measured out my distance on mapmyrun.com this morning, and I finished the first 3.1 miles or 5K in about 25 minutes! I know that’s not a world record or anything, but it made me happy because I had assumed I was doing it in around 30 minutes.  Planning to do the Race For the Cure that’s coming up, and since I was able to get in another mile and a half before the end of my run, I’m thinking I *might* just be ready for a 10K by Christmas.  :D  I’m certainly hoping and looking into races I might do….  It feels so good to have a fitness goal that isn’t weight-related!

Ok, I’m off to hop in the shower.  No pepper spray on my face today! lmao  :D  But I’m still stinky.  :p  Hope all you buddies are having a great day and feeling positive, too!!

A few days ago, my little brother decided he was going to start running with me.  He’s 17, and like so many great ideas at that age, it only lasted one day.  lol  But on that day, we ran all over the neighborhood, making a huge circle from my house to his.  Now mind you, this used to be a really great neighborhood, but over the last several years it’s gone majorly downhill.  :(   So when my husband found out where I went, he freaked out.  (I usually just run up and down our street, down and back is a quarter mile so it’s short and he can see me the whole time.)  Honestly, I thought it was ok, since I had a guy with me (well, sort of a guy. lol)  Husband was like, “He’s never been in a fight! If some thugs want to attack you, I guarantee there will be more than one cuz they’re always standing around in groups.  (Not at 6am, which he didn’t buy as valid reasoning.)  He said that if two or more guys came at us, my brother would surely do what he could, but it was guaranteed not to be enough to protect me.

He called my mom!!  And she agreed with him. 

So now I go out armed with pepper spray and a 2.9 million volt stun gun.  He did attempt to get me to take the concealed handgun classes so that I could carry that with me, but I REFUSE to run with a gun.  Knowing me, I’d trip and shoot myself in the butt cheek.

But even just up and down my street now, I’m encouraged to take my self-protection gear.  His reasoning is, it’ll give him those extra few seconds to get to me; you know, I’ll have a chance to fight back and won’t be at the mercy of an attacker until he can get there.  (Who would attack me with my husband sitting on the front steps watching??  He’s totally paranoid, but I guess if it ever happened I’d appreciate his vigilance, so I try not to complain….)

But anyway, on to my mini-crisis of the morning.  lol  I didn’t have any pockets in the pants I wore out today, so I’ve got the stun gun thing strapped around my wrist and holding it with my left hand (if the attacker rips it away, the broken wrist strap disables it so that it can’t be used against me) and the pepper spray in my right hand.  Little did I know, my pepper spray had been “test sprayed” by my husband, so there’s “wiped off” residue near the opening, but that stuff is apparently so strong, simply wiping it off the container does NO GOOD.  So a little over a mile into my run, I wipe some sweat off my face with the fingers of my right hand. Or rain… it was raining, so I bet it was more rain than sweat, but whatever it was, it was starting to get in my eyes.  So it took a few minutes (probably due to the rain) but I started to feel the burn.  It took a few more minutes for me to realize what it was, and by the time I stopped and walked up to the house, it was hurting pretty bad.  The husband thinks it’s kinda funny (mostly cuz it didn’t get into my eyes or anything that would hurt REALLY bad) but it kinda pisses me off.

I’m pretty much forced, at the very least coerced, to take all this stupid protection gear with me, when my husband is right there watching me, and then it hurts ME instead of a bad guy.    How is this fair?  Well, at least I know if anyone ever sneaks up on me, they’re in for some serious pain.  

Just wondering…. What do you guys use to protect yourself?  Ever had an incident with pepper spray?    Or do you mostly just hope that nothing bad ever happens to you and go out merrily into the world? 

And ugh… I’m up a lb and a half. Not too bad, considering I counted NO calories and exercised not at ALL (unless you count hiking up mountains while holding a 25 lb toddler, which did make me very sore, lol).  Not too bad!

I think I’m ready to let go of my calorie obsession.  I think that eating healthy foods when I’m hungry and exercising daily will give me the results I crave without the number obsession and the craziness that comes with it.  It’s worth a try, at least. 

So anyway, I’m not going to post pics this week. There’s really no reason to, since I haven’t lost any weight and I haven’t been working out.  I’m not really disappointed at this point though, because I feel like I’ve made progress in other areas (mental health related!  ) so that counts too.  After all, my personal goal is generally just to better myself, and as long as I make some measurable progress in any area, I’m happy.  I definitely feel more relaxed and less stressed, even though the scale went up.  That’s a HUGE change for the better.  Not that I’m unconcerned, but I’m just not OVERLY concerned…. does that make sense?  lol

So here’s to a renewed committment to my workouts and clean, healthy eating. (By the way, the relative we stayed with wound up being somewhat health conscious… little to no salt usage, plenty of fresh veggies, and home-grown fruits! Awesome!! It was the fast food on the 2 day drive up there and the 2 day drive home that killed me! lol)

My workout schedule for this week is 45 minutes of steady-state cardio 4 days (jogging), 30 minutes of interval training (1-minute sprint intervals) 2 days, and 4 days of weight circuits (2 total body and 2 that focus on upper body, with some core work all 4 days).

Hopefully I’ll be ready to post some update pics next Saturday!